For the past 25 years I have lived in the country-
treed lot, then wide open spaces with view of hills,
then wide open field with view of mountains.
For all my growing up years from when I can remember
until I was 18, I lived in the country
with the closest town consisting of
a small convenience store, an auto shop,
school and 3 churches.
Today I drove out into the country over rolling
hills, around swells and curves past barns
and fields. The sky was blue and the
day was lovely,
but I wept...
I have tried so hard to like and be happy in
town, to look out my window and see buildings
and railroad tracks and people passing
my home on the sidewalk.
But I am a country girl who loves nature
and the open sweetness of acres of
space to breathe.
And I weep...
for the hard reality of
what I have had to give up because
of the bad choices others have made
and the choice I made to leave, that I knew was
healthier than to stay.
I am blessed to have a home, a yard,
in a safe neighborhood, and I try to
be thankful for it each and every day
But today I wept for what I love most
and deep in my soul I crave, the country life.
Will there be fields of wildflowers and waving grass
in heaven? Will the breezes there smell of raspberries
just over the fence? Will I have time to walk
quietly alone there? Will the river of Life
be as lovely as the rivers here?
Will the tears I weep here be forgotten there?
I wait and I hope....
Karen, I cry with you and pray you find just what you need.
ReplyDeleteAww, ((hugs)). I am sorry life is hard for you. I too am weeping for my old homes here on earth. I LOVE the country life too. It looks like we will be moving to town here soon. I am grieving...I have many blessings though that others miss having... thank you for the reminder. Oh, and I miss the smell of raspberries too :)
ReplyDeleteOh, Karen. I hear your heart! At least you can get out and enjoy it sometimes!
ReplyDeleteAh, heaven, yes how I wait and I hope, too! This week while I was out walking, I noticed petals–tiny petals everywhere–from white blossoms that the breeze had scattered on the roadway. The morning sun caught the moisture in those cupped petals and made them sparkle so beautifully . . . that I immediately thought of heaven and how someday I will be walking on jeweled streets even much more glorious than this. Dear friend, although you might feel a need to venture a bit further afield at times, your country-girl heart will be blessed by nature's jewels close by as well. You have an eye for God's beautiful and bountiful gifts, big or small, near or far. Keep counting! Love, Cella
ReplyDeleteaw.....I can relate in a way, Karen! Moving is just plain hard. And, although I am glad to be in the country after all these years, I am surprised by how many things I miss about life in the neighborhood! The other Sunday it was so beautiful outside and I asked Burdette to drive over to a neighborhood so we could take a leisurely family walk there. I like the sidewalks, so everyone's Sunday cloths stay clean and the little girls can ride their bikes. I like checking out everyone else's yards and houses and saying "hello" to people! We spent many Sunday afternoons walking around the Kalama neighborhoods! But at one time I had such dear friendly neighbors on both sides that in order to go out and have a quiet cup of coffee I had to hide;) That got old too with my Kulla introvertishness . Who knows? Perhaps someday you will be back in the country again.
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